Each adoption journey is unique. One familiar story is that of a couple of individual who chooses adoption to grow their family and adopts a newborn. Another is the family which fosters a child and later adopts. But there are many paths people take to adoption. Sometimes adoption is a family affair.
One family had four biological children and a nephew with two biological children and one on the way. When his wife died of complication of childbirth, the larger family took the nephew and all of his children in to help them get on their feet and figure out how to continue as a single-father family.
Unfortunately, the stress of his situation caused the nephew to fall into substance abuse. His addiction led him to leave the children with his uncle and aunt for long periods, and then to decide to get clean and reclaim his children. His good intentions never lasted long, and his children were subjected to neglect and abuse. Eventually, his uncle asked for a restraining order and the nephew’s parental rights were terminated. His daughters stayed with their great-uncle and aunt, whom they had known all their lives.
Informal arrangements
As in many other cases of difficult family circumstances, the children’s stays with their relatives were informal. Everyone expected them to be temporary and the family was trying to help the nephew keep his family together. But — again, as happens in many cases like this one — the situation reached a point at which it became clear that the children needed a stable, permanent home.
The great-uncle and great-aunt adopted their nephew’s children. Within a short time, their father’s life ended as a consequence of his addiction, and the children settled into their new home permanently — now with seven children.
While informal arrangements are often chosen by relatives, either in the continuing hope of helping the birth parents to reunite with their children or in the mistaken belief that family members don’t need formal arrangements, informal arrangements are not a good idea for long-term care of children.
In this case, the people who cared for the children didn’t have a legal right to make medical decisions for them or to enroll them in school until they adopted the children. It is often possible to work around these restrictions for a while, but not for the long term. It can be dangerous for the children to be in this situation.
If the problem will actually be temporary, guardianship allows temporary custody. If the birth parent realistically cannot care for the children and may be putting them in danger, relative adoption is the best plan.
Heimer Law
Heimer Law specializes in adoption law. We can help and support you with guardianship or adoption.
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